I feel like I will lose control of my weight if stop taking the laxatives. I even take the laxatives with me when I go out at night so I won’t miss laxatives time.
Renfrew (eating disorder clinic) thinks I should come back to them so I can get myself off the pills. I talked to my doctor and she thinks I should take myself off slowly, but she didn’t tell me how slowly just slowly.
What has got me is the fact that I am not losing more weight. I exercise, eat less than 1000 calories a day and take laxatives so why can’t I lose the weight?
I am 5 feet 5 inches tall and I want to weigh around 105 pounds. I believe that is about another 10 pounds. Why can’t I drop the weight? Thanks for being there for me.
Think about this. It must be pretty disruptive to your social life to never be far from a bathroom either because the laxatives are working. Do you really want to live like this? When a behavior controls your life, it represents addictive behavior. Let go of the laxatives and as long as you eat and exercise reasonably, your weight won’t get out of control.
Renfrew may be what you need considering the range of thoughts you have from suicide to laxative abuse. Do you want to get healthy? Then you have to take steps to put yourself in a situation that supports your getting healthy. As long as you are in an environment that supports your anorexia, you will struggle. You need to remove any food you have ever binged on or abused from your environment as it controls your life. You don’t have time for much else considering the amount of time your eating, exercise, and laxative activities take. Think about it. Is this how you want to spend your life?
What your doctor means is if you are taking 5 laxatives at night, take 4 for a few days, then 3 for a few days, then 2 for a few days, then 1 for a few days and finally quit. Seems reasonable. You should read the ingredients in the laxative you buy. In August 1997, the FDA proposed banning the sale of laxatives that contain phenolphthalein due to tumor development and genetic damage in animals taking high doses for relatively short periods of time (6 months). Some laxatives were reformulated so read the ingredient label.
At 5 feet 5 inches, 111 to 149 pounds is a healthy weight for you. At 105, you would be underweight and at risk for more anorexic behavior. Your body knows that your current weight of 115 pounds is healthy. Re-think your goal and why you want to weight 105. Your beauty is inside you, not outside.